balance

I have been a professional artist for around 20 years. It sounds romantic doesn't it? But I think every month I have a near mental crisis over what it means to be an artist.

I have two young boys who I adore, I am madly in love with my husband, (who is incredibly supportive of my artistic desires). However, this life with a family as at odds sometimes with my art. You see most of the artists who achieve the success I long for, sacrifice relationships, and much more to achieve that success.

Some days I don't know how to get started. I want to work on so many projects, many are speculative and don't pay. Or at least haven't born fruit yet. Then there is the marketing and the business stuff I NEED to do, but don't. There is the bread and butter work that pays the bills, but isn't always the creative work I want. As a mom I have obligations too. I am the Art Literacy coordinator at my son's school. I value that job. I have grocery shopping to do. Phone calls to make. Some days it is a struggle to prioritize. I work late at night a lot. The kids are sleeping. My husband is reading or watching sports. I get conflicted because I want to spend time with my husband at night too. Yet often I draw, draw and draw.

As much as I love my art and my goals as an artist, art breaks my heart all the time. Disappointment from the letters of acceptance that haven't arrived yet, to the art that is well loved but still hasn't sold. Being an artist is both liberating and soul wrenching. I know I can never do anything else, because being an artist isn't really a choice. Being an artist is WHO I am. I love working from home, researching what I want to create then spending hours creating. The business aspect is not fun. Balancing my artistic life with the people I love is the biggest challenge. Yet having both my art and my family is the biggest reward.

royalties

Last year when the economy really took a nose dive (for me it was last January), I decided to start working on new art for licensing. I had been to Surtex twice before as an observer and knew a bit about licensing. Not much mind you, there is so much to learn. But I knew in essence what it was and the basics of what I needed to do. So I started working, sketching, writing down matrices of what I wanted to draw, categories and ideas. My sketchbook started to fill up with new work until finally I found it was time to actualize the work into finished pieces.

February was the month I spent painting and creating patterns, and repeats. I took all the time I would have spent on design work for customers (who vanished with their budgets) and took all the sketches to final art. I can't tell you how many hours I spent, but it was all of February, day and yes into the night.

March came and I decided enough images were done to put together promos and start submitting to manufacturers. I researched and compiled and started sending. Nothing happened. So I kept drawing, and painting, researching and occasionally sending. I responded to a small Craig's List ad and end up creating 4 patterns for Sock It To Me Socks.

Fast forward to July. I got an email from one of the manufacturers. They liked what I sent and wanted to look at more. I sent more. They presented all my work and said they loved it, got great responses, sent me a contract. I wondered if this was it, the big break. But no, learned that you still sit and wait for orders. Not a bad thing, just a thing requiring patience.

August, draw, paint, mock-up, send. That was September through December too. I did submit a few things during that time, including some art to Sassy Switches. Yippee they liked what they saw and I signed a contract. Now, sit and wait.

Fast forward again to February. Surprise surprise at the mailbox, I got my first royalty check! Sassy Switches just sent me my first $41.65 in royalties. To you it may not be much, but to me it is an exciting and rewarding moment in time. The beginning of something new, of a new path, another angle, another means to earn a living as an artist.

It has been a little over a year since I lost my old clients and I am still making new art and submitting. Getting good feedback, interested parties, and in general positive movement forward. Each day I find there is a lot more to learn, I have so much art yet to finish, to mock-up and submit. But it is a good day. I am a lucky girl.